Comments on: Adoption Etiquette

By: Alyson

Alyson — Tue, 07 Apr 2009 15:12:17 +0000

Jill -

Well done! These terms are so common to those of us who live with them and yet somewhat awkward for others. Thanks for trying to educate and help others.

By: Jill@ModernMommyBlog

Jill@ModernMommyBlog — Thu, 26 Mar 2009 22:38:40 +0000

Janis,
Thank you for the feedback. I didn’t even realize that I had written biological until you pointed it out. I meant to write “birth mother”. I do know a few birth mothers who do prefer that term.

Jill@ModernMommyBlog’s last blog post..Entertainment on a Tight Budget

By: Jill@ModernMommyBlog

Jill@ModernMommyBlog — Thu, 26 Mar 2009 22:34:00 +0000

Amy B. That is your experience and so it is valid. For me I feel that making an adoption plan is absolutley an act of motherhood or parenting. In most cases the relinquished child will always be a part of the first parents life even if they never see them again. When you entrust the care of your child to another set of parents you are doing something completely selfless purely for the sake of your child. In cases where the child has been removed from the home because of abuse I could understand that it would be a different story. Jill@ModernMommyBlog’s last blog post..Entertainment on a Tight Budget

By: Amy B.

Amy B. — Thu, 26 Mar 2009 01:42:50 +0000

Well as a adopted child AND as a adoptive mama I have to say that the term Bio-parent was always a great way for me to understand and explain who my parents were…and…I never thought of my bio parents as mom/dad because they absolutely were not parents in any sense other than a biological. If you have nothing to do with a child post birth how are you a mom? A parent? In thought only? Not trying to be crazy harsh but this is just my own experience/thoughts.

By: Janis Duncan, MSW(LCSW)

Janis Duncan, MSW(LCSW) — Tue, 24 Mar 2009 04:14:49 +0000

I’ve been a practicing psychotherapist for 35 years, a (birth)Mother for 40 years, and have worked with adoption triad members for the past 18 years. I inquire always about the language in the adoption arena with its members. I have yet to ever, ever hear a mother who has relinquished her child for adoption reacting favorably to being called, or referred to as, the ‘biological mother.’ It sounds cold, sterile, and detached like mechanical breeding machines…which was/is hardly the case.
Your article was very informative and I hope you will impart this information as well.
A ‘Mother’ is a mother, the one who gives birth and the one who parents. Both of these ‘Mothers’ love their (not ‘the’) child.
Adoption Center for Counseling, Education, and Research, Inc.
Henderson, Nevada

By: inadvertent farmer

inadvertent farmer — Thu, 19 Mar 2009 15:57:00 +0000

Wonderful advice....from a mom of both adoped and bio. inadvertent farmer’s last blog post..How I Know Spring is Here...part 4